Camino Santiago de Compostela
They say there is three stages on your camino
And one by one you will travel through them all
When or where, no one can tell you
But you will know, when you are there
This is a story of my personal experience
Of those three stages on my camino
First stage – The physical stage
The journey beguines
You will get to know your body
You are finding new things about your body
You will learn your physical limits
You will do things, you didn’t know you are capable of
For me this meant blisters, shin splints, broken knees
And leg pain which kept me awake during the nights
Eventually
I learned to take it easy
But in the hard way
I didn’t want to stop
I wanted to get forward
I could almost see the goal glowing in the horizon
Although there were still over 800 km left and we had just started
I didn’t have time to stop for every wonder I saw on the way
I don’t have time, I’m walking here!
Then God made me stop
I broke my knee in the deep downhill
I didn’t fall
I just didn’t listen to my body
And in the end of the day
I couldn’t step on my foot anymore
The next day I could walk again
Real slowly
We started walking before sunrise
To win some time
But during the morning we saw how people walked past us
Countless bag packs vanishing somewhere ahead of us
Instead of thinking how slowly I was going forward
I started to look what was around me
I stopped for weird plants
I touched and smelled them
There was so much beautiful and amazing things all around
I started to relax
I enjoyed the day a lot
The next morning I was able to walk normally again
But something inside of me had changed
I enjoyed briskly walking
I stopped more often for wonders
I saw more
I felt more
I wasn't willing to slow down by myself
So God made me slow down
I learned my lesson
And He let me heal
I started to respect the deep downhill’s
And came down real carefully
Knowing my own physical limits
But never giving up
Never losing my faith
Knowing
He will always walk beside me
Second stage – The mental stage
Anyone can recognize the first stage
It beguines on the first day of their camino
But how do you know you have reached the second stage?
We were wondering this with the other pilgrims
And I think I can speak for all of us, when I say
Trust me, you will definitely know when things starts to go mental
For me it started when I cried first time on the camino
Or at least this was the moment I realized it
I had reached the second stage of my camino
There started to be a lot of feelings involved
A lot of conflicts and distress
A lot of mixed and negative energy
For me this was real uneasy stage of my camino
Many times I found myself wondering
When would this end?
My own distressed feelings were bothering me
And I knew
For reaching the spiritual stage
I would have to be above all of this
Of this shit I was throwing around in my head
But how the hell it would be possible?
So I gave up
I accept my feelings
Didn't try to make them disappear
Maybe on my camino there would be only two stages
Third stage – The spiritual stage
We had almost reached the end of the physical camino
Few days and we could say we did it
In these days I realized it
It felt like someone would had turned the lights on
I could see everything more clearly
I could feel the change in my body
I found myself feeling happiness and joy
The distress was still in me
But it didn’t control me anymore
I was feeling happy despite the negative feelings inside me
No more was I looking the world through my distress
It couldn’t control my reactions and words anymore
It didn't have the power
I could observe my reactions inside me
I could choose how I wanted to act
I could choose how I wanted to express myself
I felt free, truly free
Free from myself
In a way
The camino felt longer than just 35 days
It felt like a life time
I knew this would be a life changing experience
God wouldn't lead me on this camino for nothing
But still
I learned more than I was expecting
More about myself, other people and world itself
About life itself
And now
Sitting at home and writing this
I have a feeling
That the learning will continue
A long time after this journey has ended
When I have settled down
Back to my normal life
But for me the normal life won’t be the same anymore
For us who have walked the camino
Our life will be so much more than it used to be
More deeper and more colorful
We had spent a life time away
From this 'normal' world
The people who can truly know the meaning of this
Who have been on the same kind of journey
Shared the camino with you
They can truly understand your experience
After all it feels like
You have already known each other
For a life time
Con mucho cariño a
Bear Family
